I am getting a lot of hits to this article from search engines with from key words like
"my child won't eat at school"
"preschooler doesn't eat at school"
"what can happen if kids don't eat enough"
This is the time of year when parents notice lunch boxes coming home full or partially eaten. I hope this helps shed light on what's going on in the cafeteria and gives you multiple solutions to each problem. This article was first published last fall. Somewhere in here there will be a solution that will help your child eat more lunch at school. If it's possible, go have lunch with your child, so you know what the environment is like in the lunchroom._____
About once a month I go eat lunch with my 5 year old at the elementary school and with my 3 year old at preschool. I always make some sobering observations. Here are some of the issues young kids face when eating start to finish is 25 minutes, there are limited adults assisting with the eating process, and there are lots of distractions, namely other kids to be silly and socialize with. With each issue I've listed some possible solutions to the light school lunch problem. In each case, it's necessary to do some practice at home. Sure in time, your child may learn to eat a decent lunch in a fixed amount of time, but you can be his partner in acquiring that skill quicker. The sooner they can eat a good lunch, the sooner they'll thrive at school.
Not sure how much your child eats at school? Ask them what happens to the food they don't finish. Does it go in the trash? How much goes in the trash? A little? A lot? Have they ever thrown away an item that hasn't had any bites taken out of it? Every day? Every week? You may be surprised to hear that your child's teacher doesn't observe them eating. At our public school the classroom teacher is not present during lunch in the cafeteria. It's possible that no one is managing how much or little your child eats! There are aids available to help and kids are taught to ask for help, but the aid to kid ratio is pretty high. Not all kids ask for help and not all kids wait long enough to be helped.
Drinks a lot, Eats a littleMost of the kindergartner's I've observed at lunch start with their drink. Perhaps they are thirsty and need their thirst quenched more urgently than their hunger tamed. The problem is many kids guzzle their entire drink, which is usually between 8-14 oz BEFORE they take a bite. Now even if the drink is zero calorie water, their little empty tummies have just ballooned up. If they are sugar (juice drinks, vitamin, flavored milk drinks) or protein/fat (milk, vitamin drinks) calories in the beverage then the false sense of fullness is accompanied by 1-200 empty or less nutrient dense calories. While plain white milk and 100% juice offer some nutrients, they can't provide enough fuel for your child's day. Drinks containing some nutrients can take up precious real estate in your child's tummy. When the tummy expands from a drink it sends a signal to the brain that it's full and the child nibbles and picks at the rest of their meal. Sadly the full feeling doesn't let up until after the child has returned to the classroom. Then the child is faced with learning the rest of the day's curriculum on an empty stomach.
Possible Solutions:- Send no calorie beverages (water, unsweetened decaf tea). Hopefully kids don't guzzle these drinks (because they are less tasty) allowing them to fill up on food before filling up on drink. Avoid artificially sweetened beverages. They do meet the no calorie requirement, but are full of chemicals. We just don't know enough about these chemicals and their long term effect on organs. Giving them to kids is playing with fire in my opinion.
- Teach your child to sip their drink while eating. Work on this skill while eating meals at home. Tell your child to save some of their beverage for after they've eaten some/most of their food. This skill will take time. If you have preschoolers, start now!
- Work on the skill of eating after finishing a drink at home meals. Offer the same size drinks for breakfast, dinner and weekend meals that your child drinks for lunch and give your child time to practice eating a decent meal while also consuming their drink. In the long term this over-rides the brain's ability to help the child slow down eating when fullness is sensed in the stomach, and it could lead to over-eating. I'm not saying don't do it, I'm just saying be aware of the possible consequence.
Lots of Silly, Little EatingSadly, the elementary school day does not provide many opportunities outside the classroom to socialize, be silly and playful. There are 20 minutes or so on the playground. Even Kindergartners are expected to have a lot of responsibility and master a lot of new content, not to mention (at least in Texas) attend school all day, every day. The temptation to ignore food and talk with friends or unwind from a skill building morning, is high. Kids who don't know the purpose of food, miss a window of opportunity to refuel for the afternoon.
Possible Solutions- Teach the value of food. Food is fuel. Food fuels their brain and their body to learn all the stuff the teachers present for 7 hours. Think of the last time you learned a lot in 7 hours. Extrapolate that to 5 days a week, 9 months a year. Think of how hard it would be to be attentive and cooperative during the process if you were hungry, or your body didn't have the right kind of fuel. Finishing lunch enables them to have fun while learning. Make the food body connection during family meals. Macronutrients are nutrients the body needs a lot of to function and are : carbohydrates, protein and fat. In a car analogy, macronutrients are "the gas" that fuels a car.
- Connect the food with the function. Every kid has a favorite part of the day. Many like the playground. Many prefer a subject. Many like art or health fitness (PE) or music. Make the connection relevant. How does food make their day possible? Enjoyable? Energy foods are carbohydrates (good ones have carbs and fiber or carbs and protein or carbs and fiber and protein). Brain foods are protein and fat. Micronutrients are needed in smaller quantities and are: vitamins, minerals, antioxidants and phytochemicals. They prevent disease, repair cells, improve/maintain organ function. In the car analogy micronutrients is the "oil" that helps the engine run smoothly.
- Build focus on eating skills. Kids have to learn to multitask. If they need an outlet for socializing or unwinding, they must accomplish that AND eating at lunch. Practice eating while doing something else at family meals. Take turns telling news of the day, telling stories, or even doing an activity. Remind you child to take bites while participating in the conversation, story telling, activity. Over time they'll build the skill do eat and do something else at the same time.
No assistance, no eatingMany kids just haven't developed the skill to eat unassisted. They eat OK when an adult is sitting with them reminding them to focus on food, cutting food up, taking food out of containers, or feeding them bites. However, when there is little direction, there is little eating. Self directed eating is a skill that needs building.
Possible Solutions- Make sure your child can open the containers/packages you send with them, or that come with cafeteria lunches. Let them practice opening bags of chips, plastic reusable containers, Ziploc bags, thermos, juice boxes, pulling foil lids off yogurt/applesauce, straw wrappers, etc. at home. At my son's school, kids can raise their hand to get help opening something but they usually have to wait for a few minutes or more before one of the staff can help. Often the child will put their hand down and opt out of getting help when it's not available immediately. There are containers with foil lids in school lunches too.
- Talk about an school lunch eating plan with your child. It can be simple. Step one, decide what to eat first. Step two, open up first thing and eat it/grab a utensil and eat it. Step three, open thing two and eat it. Step three, open drink and drink it. Step four: finish eating and drinking.
- Practice self directed eating at home with a timer. If you habitually help your child finish his meal by feeding him bites or reminding him to eat, stop doing this. Tell him it's his job to start and finish his meal. Finish should not be defined as "eating all the food." A better definition of finished is eating until full, or eating enough to refuel the body. Set a timer and don't assist (unless asked to). After the timer goes off, give him some feedback. Start by telling him what he did well. "wow, you ate almost half of your XYZ without any help from me." Then prompt the child to tell you what he could improve on. "can you see anything on your plate you didn't eat enough of?" Follow that up with "how could you get more XYZ bites in your tummy?" Help out if he's stumped. "I think if you remembered to put another bite in you mouth right after you swallow, you'll finish more food."
Too many choices, not much eatingThe younger the child the harder it is for them to choose. You may think you're helping your child by sending lots of options and letting them pick the things they want to eat, but many young kids spend valuable time taking all the options out of the bag, organizing them on the table, then deliberating on which to eat. I watched a 3 year old in my son's class take 10 full minutes to empty his lunch box and pick something to eat. In fact, he didn't make a choice until I prompted him. He took about eight individually wrapped/contained items out of his bag, carefully placed them on the table and sat there observing them for several minutes. I noticed he hadn't started eating and asked "Wow, look at all those choices you have, so many delicious things. Where do you want to start?" He then opened several items up before taking a bite. It was half way into lunch period and no food had been consumed! Pair slow eating with a late start and you have a cause for a lunch that's too light.
Possible Solutions- Menu plan lunches. Before packing a lunch for the day/week, ask your child what they want. Let them make their choice before arriving at cafeteria. Have several options for each lunch component (fruit, sandwich/main course, snack, veggie). You should include a protein, a carb and some fruit/veggies. Carbohydrate only lunches wreak havoc on blood stream, making attentiveness and cooperativeness difficult to achieve. Fiber (whole grains, fruit, veggies, beans) and protein (meat, dairy, nuts, beans, eggs) are must haves at lunch.
- Send no more than 4 items. They don't really have time to make choices. Take the choice off the table entirely. If they spend a lot of time opening up items (or waiting to get help opening up items), there is less time to eat them.
Plan to spend several months (or longer for preschoolers) helping build self directed eating habits with your kids. It won't happen over night. Good luck and let me know if you have questions along the way!
If you need ideas here are
25 healthy ideas for school lunches and a post about the
guidelines I follow when making school lunches for early grade school and preschool years.
For more recipes and kid appeal tips on how to make real food relevant to your kids, click there to join the food with kid appeal facebook fan page, or there to become a subscriber via email or google reader. We share What's for Dinner (WFD) daily on Facebook, and I pose a "Question of the Day" (QOTD).